♥ spends most of her time in her room staring at her ceiling *day dreaming* full of glow in the dark stickers
♥ keeps picking on her eye lashes :| because it itches
♥ loves doodling, pizza, boorger, pasta, pucca and every food that she can think of
♥ sometimes makes her own recipe when left alone in the kitchen
♥ loves playing with boomboom *one-eyed pup*
♥ does not have any clue on things she does for the first time
my must haves and must dos
♥ finish this darn template
♥ make cordon bleu
♥ look for a polaroid cam
♥ clean my closet ♥
♥ get a job
♥ meet 10 new people ♥
♥ finish my photo cork board ♥
♥ know more about photoshop *noob*
♥ buy myself cosmetics from Etude House
♥ go to 10 new places this year
♥ outing with friends or by myself
♥ managed my own resto-bar! oh yeah!
First Blog Ever
whose fault is it?
My day started by waking up from my dad's call..banging on the door as loud as he can. He slept outside, at the sofa from 2 am (I think) up to 8:30 am :| He was so mad. And for someone that rarely gets pissed off, he sure does know how to show it big time.
I guess it my fault, as always, because my room is closer to the door...but then my brother sleeps upstairs and he can easily hear the call as well.
Poor dad, all the way from Marinduque just so he could find himself locked out from the house.
The good thing about my dad is once he sleeps it off, everything is forgotten.
I can't wait to earn so as to save my ass from being blamed every time something like this happens.
I can't believe I'm about to say this but I'm tired of being alone. Mom's at the States or in the plane right now, Dad is in Marinduque, Tita's at the hospital with my cousin and I just see my brother every night from work...I'm sick of his face :| but it's better than having no one.
3-4 years ago I would definitely not be complaining about being alone but now, I need some company..I need to see faces and feel presence in this house.
I'm just sick and tired, everyday I have a lot of moments where I just keeps still and felt I missed a lot of people. Yeah, I have a heart now and I have feelings...WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME??
doggie trouble again
I seriously need the Dog Whisperer in my life, barking...barking and barking at anyone who passes by will probably leave my ears bleeding.
The Dog Whisperer or my dad will do. Usually they are all behaved and barking kept to a minimum when he's around, it sucks for not having him around all the time, especially now that it's so fine that he's here because I already quit smoking. No more busting, no more hiding and no more spending Php140 in a week.
I have computed the amount of money I have spent in a pack of smokes for 2 years and big whoop! I should have been 14k+ richer now :|
Anyway, I was thinking of downsizing my pets before this year ends, meaning I have to give up 2 old ones, Spike and Mica to my aunt, Lulu will definitely go back to our neighbor and Boomboom and Bully Boy will stay here because they are both male, no chances of impregnating each other and they are the only ones that I can really deal with.
what am i doing?
Late mor-night post before I hit the sheets.
I have been day-dreaming about buying a lot and build my dream house. I have been wanting something like a condo unit in the metro but having a house of your own is so much better. Functional and stylish, a flat screen in the living room area that is adjacent to the dining area. A super cool looking kitchen with metal or marble top counters where a built in oven for my "frustrated baker" self, and there's also a bar where we can eat our breakfast freshly cooked next to the "digital stove" (I don't know who they call it and I don't want to google it)
Then there also a door from the kitchen and the dining area leading to the backyard where I can put a huge table if ever we want to eat out or I can just put it somewhere in the front porch.
There's a place for my dogs to roam around and I'll build them a doggie house for the rainy days.
My bedroom will be clutter free and I'll have my own bathroom and closet.
I have been dreaming about lot of things lately, dreaming about what I would do if ever I have the money. I will go to Arching lessons because I think Katniss Everdeen is awesome, I would race like the one you see in Grand Prix, I would go to the gym to work out or engage myself in yoga and car, I want to have my own car, it doesn't matter if it's a beat up old one as long as it will take me to places...and I don't really know anything about cars :| Apparently, the logo quiz I downloaded proves how clueless I am when it comes to cars.
Finally, my dream of going overseas...to different countries...dressing up so I'll be picture perfect. I haven't gave up on that dream yet, not now not ever! I will be going to places from A-Z.
Someone I really love visited me today :)
My dogs kept on barking, I assume they were just excited and starving but when I came out, I saw a gray dog in front of our gate. She got off her leash so I am waiting for someone to pick her up. But then the stupid kids began throwing stones at her, I cursed one of them and I brought Lulu back to her home. No one was around, oh boy...the chain was hanging on the gate so I tie her..nice and easy and left.
I was the only one who took care of my dogs, so I have this feeling of responsibility though I already gave her away. The mere thought of having nowhere to go under the heat of the sun or as always under the pouring rain bugs me, so I head back after 3 hours...just checking to see if she's okay, and asked Lola Tale...our street's official granny :D to check her from time to time.
I'm really proud that I have been kind to dogs since I was a kid, and it just pisses me off to see these brats making fun of them!
And she's back :|
She broke her chain and now she's not lonely anymore..being surrounded by her two brothers. It just shows that she never forgot about me and this house and she's still her usual self...nice, sweet and tough. Ate Cristy went here a while ago and ask me to keep an eye on Lulu temporarily.
vaping until i don't want to anymore
There, I googled it. Out of curiousity, I just want to know how would I feel when I've been smoking for roughly 2 years and just quit. This particular subject caught my eye.
It all started 3 days ago when I have been having this dreams that were quite weird. I can't remember what happened on the first day and the whole story for that matter, I just knew a few bits that were quite real.
On the second day, I dreamt about tiny baboons/gorillas in different sizes, very similar to Matryoshka doll. You know? Those dolls that comes in different sizes and can be placed inside each other. So yes, those freaking baboons bit my finger and I really saw blood and it also bit my mom all over her body. I'm talking about dreams okay? (Just in case you find this post getting weirder and weirder)
In another scene, we were in a room or a house with other people I don't know except for two and something's out to get us.
I was staring out the window and this mini train used for mining (why everything so tiny??) were being rode by someone. The rail tracks makes a big circle and a bunch of people were waiting on the other side...jumping and having fun. I saw someone outside with them, THE ONE I really know and then his mother came in holding a candle explaining that the train was for people to say goodbye to the others...apparently they were spirits or ghosts. When it was my turn, I was crying while the boy was smiling and looking happy...I did cry a lot in my dream and when I was about to hug him, I WOKE UP...all teary-eyed. I told you it's really vivid.
I sent a message to that person asking him to text back when he receives it, just to check up on him, that's all.
And just this mor-night, I dreamt about being chased by some people where in I have to squeeze myself to secret passages in someone's house so that I could get away and hide.
It's really weird.
Yet again another wedding is coming up... 4 days too soon for me. I don't know the motif so I'm clueless on what I have to buy, plus it will be held in Lucban, Quezon. The ceremony will be in the morning, my dad's not here, my mom's not coming and my brother probably won't go either.
I need a plan...in fact, WE need to come up with a plan.
Why did they just invite us NOW? When clearly, a wedding is planned for a year, right?
am i lame??
Before I judge someone, I really try to assess myself if I have done something like what they did. And I have to admit, back in highschool, I was pretty lame :| crying over a crush, doing emo stuff like a teenager going through puberty and the way I see it now..."WHAT WAS I THINKING!?"
That was pretty fucked up.
When we broke up, I did cry but I never (I think) went to Facebook and used rants as my status :| I just think it's private and I'm doing my online friends a favor :D
So anyway, I have been seeing my cousin's status for a week now..even making a profile picture of her teary eye :| and now I know that her boyfriend's going to work overseas..so she wrote a poem :|
oh my god.
I used to write a poem to but it was for my Home Economics class :| I know right? A poem in Home Ec?! I used my crush as inspiration and I really hope I remember what I wrote, but I don't...except that the first line was done by my friend and I just sort of make my way from it, hoping that I produced 3 stanzas and making sure that the last word of each line rhymes :))
I think there's a difference with being cheesy and just sticking to that compared to being cheesy verging into being lame. I just don't know how they are different but I'm pretty sure they're not the same :))
Sometimes, the past just haunts me. The things that I have done to someone keeps me awake from night til dawn. I have been bad (beyond) and I think I haven't completely forgiven myself for it. It has been roughly 4 years now and the memory just sneaks when I find myself curled up in bed and just think.